You love me dearly

I told him " I tak tahulah  you nak kahwin dengan i sebab kawan-kawan you semua dah kahwin or you memang nak I"

And he said, "Now you questioned my love for you after all that i did? All those effort,..worthless?"

...

" You don't ever questioned my love towards you. My love for you is the same as the day i ajak you nikah "

"There is a reason why i choose to marry you"

At the corner of the balcony i sat there silence. Sobbing sound clearly heard on the other side of the cellphone.

At that moment, i know he truly love me and was so afraid of losing me.

Surat Untuk Starla

Teruntuk kamu hidup dan matiku

Aku tak tahu lagi harus dengan kata apa aku menuliskannya

Atau dengan kalimat apa aku mengungkapkannya

Karna untuk kepergian kalinya

Kau buat aku kembali percaya akan kata cinta

Dan benar bahwa cinta masih berkuasa diatas segalanya

Ketika hati yang mudah rapuh ini

Diuji oleh duniawi diuji oleh materi

Untuk kesekian kali lagi lagi dan lagi

I am so in love with this song that i can play it on repeat for as long as i can.

WHY?

Because i think it matches my current situation. FYI i am still on going progress of writing all the wonderful things that happen to me.

This song is from a guy who trully loves the girl but i am going to give this song indirectly to my fiance agar kamu tahu " bila musim berganti, sampai waktu terhenti, walau dunia membenci, ku tetap di sini, bila habis sudah waktu ini, tak lagi berpijak pada dunia, telah aku habiskan sisa cintaku hanya untukmu" that is my promise to you, my love.

Kutuliskan kenangan tentang

Caraku menemukan dirimu

Tentang apa yang membuatku mudah

Berikan hatiku padamu

Takkan habis sejuta lagu

Untuk menceritakan cantikmu

Kan teramat panjang puisi

Tuk menyuratkan cinta ini

Telah habis sudah cinta ini

Tak lagi tersisa untuk dunia

Karena tlah kuhabiskan

Sisa cintaku hanya untukmu

Aku pernah berpikir tentang

Hidupku tanpa ada dirimu

Dapatkah lebih indah dari

Yang kujalani sampai kini

Aku slalu bermimpi tentang

Indah hari tua bersamamu

Tetap cantik rambut panjangmu

Meskipun nanti tak hitam lagi

Bila habis sudah waktu ini

Tak lagi berpijak pada dunia

Telah aku habiskan

Sisa hidupku hanya untukmu

Dan tlah habis sudah cinta ini

Tak lagi tersisa untuk dunia

Karena tlah kuhabiskan

Sisa cintaku hanya untukmu

A little bit of this and that

Sometimes i wish i wake up to September 28th 2018.

Sometimes i wish for my life back at February 2016.

Tired of counting days,
Tired of faking smile and happiness,
Tired of the same thing over and over again.

I am telling myself i can go through this.

I am telling myself i can ignore all the negativity.

I am telling myself i am strong.

BUT truth is,... i am very fragile. The longer i hold, the stronger the pain.

This is adulting and there is no escape.

Kursus Pra Perkahwinan

I remember the time when all of my Uni friend all excited to join the course. They told me "Kau pergi sekarang, nanti nak kawen senang, tak payah attend dah!"
But i stick to my words, that i will be attending it with the one i want to marry.

And

On February 10th 2018, i was registered to the course at Al Taqwa mosque TTDI.
It was 2 days program:

Saturday 10th, 8.30 am till 6.30pm
Sunday 11th, 8.30 am till 1.00pm

So i went there with my Fiance, Syafiq along with his friend and fiancee (Izwan and Yana)

It was a good sharing session, but for me it's a little dull (maybe because i was unhappy with the seating arrangement)

Saturday session ends and we continue with watching football (Ars vs Spurs: 0-1) -had a lovely butter chicken for dinner <3 p="">
It was so hard for me to woke up on Sunday morning to attend the second session and knowing i had to or else i don't get the cert so akak kuatkan diri juga.

It was the longest 5 hours talk i ever feel but damn it was so nice when it ends.

What i learn through out the ceramah was:

1.  Money is not everything but everything needs money
2. A guy should be very well prepared for all the responsibilities they going to carry after they said "Aku terima nikah..."
3. Communication is the key to a healthy relationship 
4. A man that hit a woman is never a good guy
5. Sabar
6. Give and take

and a lot more actually, and it is very beneficial if we go to the talk with our soulmate rather than going alone so that both can understand the roles of each other.

Sunday ended and we end up lepak at Dotty's after the talk.

Now sis dah boleh kawen! yay!

typical #OOTD at the entrance of the cafe